More trouble

My gf yelled at me last night for running too much. - Pause - reread that sentence and let it sink in. Yes, you read that correctly...FOR RUNNING! I mean of all things to get in trouble for, I never thought trying to live a healthy lifestyle would be one of them. I'll be the first to admit fault when I'm guilty like the time I got drunk and tried to fight a burly bouncer, but really ended up just punching a wall. In the words of Kanye West, "If you fall on the concrete, that’s your ass fault" but to get the silent treatment for wanting to get in shape? Where's the logic there? Sometimes, I think she'd rather me be a 500 pound cow.

Another Gerrism

Here's a convo btw Camay(she was named after the soap! lol) and my gf:

GF: You free this week to study French and blink blink your iphone?
Camay: Huh?? What's blink blink?
GF: You know, bedazzle it! Cover it in rhinestones! Blink! Blink!
Camay: Ummm you mean BLING BLING?
GF: It's called blink blink no? It's so shiny it makes you blink.

All silliness aside, you have to admit it kind of makes sense.

OMG soooo embarrassing ...

While eating dim sum at Jing Fong we noticed there was a private party going on to celebrate a centenarian's birthday. There was a giant sign with some Chinese writing which neither of us could read, but we couldn't miss the "103" written in large print. Between my bites of har gow and siu mai and her chewing of rubbery chicken feet, we marveled about what it would be like to live for over a century. We wondered what condition the 103 year old was in, figuring that she was probably wheelchair bound and senile. After the meal, my gf's curiosity lead her to walk pass the wooden dividers separating the private celebration with the general dining hall. She stood off to the side, taking in the grand festivities. After 5 minutes of waiting for her by the exit, I finally walked over to her to see what was so fascinating. That's when the centenarian's daughter walked over to talk to us and invite us in to get a closer view of her beautiful mother, who was sitting at the center table chatting happily with her family and friends. She looked amazingly youthful! As if that wasn't embarrassing enough, she then proceeded to hand us 2 slices of birthday cake. By then my blushing gf couldn't wait to escape towards the exit let alone nibble on some undeserved cake, I however honored the centenarian by gobbling up the cake in a few bites = )

Update

With rental shoes, gf bowls in the 80's and 90's.
With $140 professional bowling shoes, gf bowls a 61 during an important match.

It goes without saying but since this is a blog; I told you so.

That's genius!

Move over brilliant minds of this world and make room for my gf. The other day while getting ready to go out she accidentally, ummm, I mean miraculously discovered a cure to negate ALL bad smells. You're strolling through Chinatown when BAM! stinky fish odor hits your olfactory senses. You're running the lower loop in central park and WOAH! what's that shit smell..ahhh, horse shit! Buuu Buu BUUUUUUUU! Your bf just farted in bed and now you're trapped in a dutch oven. All these foul situations can be avoided with this ingenious idea. And without further ado...........spray perfume up your nose rather than on your body! lol you had to be there, it was too cute!

Hobbies

I love when my gf finds interest in my hobbies, but there's this one issue that annoys me when it comes to introducing her to my favorite pastimes. For instance, two years ago I took my gf snowboarding for her 1st time. It took her the whole winter season to get the hang of it and she is definitely still considered a beginner, yet she goes out and splurges on a brand-spanking-new, sweet BURTON board. Here I am, after 5 seasons still riding the same entry-level doodoo board. I'm doing 50/50 boardslides and catching air in the terrain park on a shitty, scratched up board while she struggles just to stand up on some top of the line pro board.
I always tell her you have to earn the right to buy the best equipment and that the best equipment isn't going to help make a significant improvement for any sport unless you practice. I guess all this wisdom went in one ear and out the other for her, since she just bought a pair of $140 bowling shoes after 1 practice session. I might be alone in this particular case since I'm sure her Strikeforce teammates are going to support her decision. They'd say: "Relax man, we'll take any advantage we can get."

Sob Sob

My gf yelled at me for renting, Hachi: A Dog's Tale, because she couldn't stop crying while watching the movie. It's about a very loyal dog that greets his master everyday at the train station. You should watch it, unless you have an emotional gf too!