The Big Day

I apologize to my dear readers for the lack of updates recently. If you haven't heard the big news already, my funny girlfriend is now my...funny WIFE! I know right? You can't believe it either. After putting up with so much of her craziness I married her anyway. It's really surprising to me too as I never thought I would get married but after being together for 6 years I knew she was the one for me. To be honest, I didn't think I was ready for marriage but sometimes a near-death experience puts everything into perspective. Right at that instant your life just flashes before you and you come to the realization that life is short and there's so much more that you want to accomplish. It happened while we were driving back from Vermont during a bad snow storm this past winter. It was nearly 1am and the snow had already accumulated a good 5 inches on the slippery road. I kept squinting my eyes to keep them focused on the now barely visible line dividing the twisting country road. My gf sat quietly in the passenger seat. Out of nowhere she blurts out "marry me or I'll kill you." There was something so compelling in that statement that we got hitched not long after that night.

Diamonds are forever

I noticed that diamond engagement rings have been on my gf's mind lately. I'm sure of this because I have a very keen sense of observation. For instance, she'll subtly leave the web browser open to the bluenile.com engagement ring page or she'll tell me she's going to Tiffany & Co. to look at diamond rings with her friend. She even told me she would give me a 1/4 carat "discount" from the carat size she REALLY wants. Now if that's not true love I don't know what is! Here's a little secret for all the fellas in a similar position: Every time your gf brings up the diamond engagement ring topic just say "I'm going to Jared's." It works every time!

Perv

My gf recently started watching this show on Showtime called Masters of Sex. She forced me to watch an episode with her and to summarize, it's pretty much a Pervert's dream. The show is based around a sex doctor's study of the female orgasm. So watching the show pretty much equates to watching people fornicate and play with themselves. I thought guys were perverted. At least we watch our porn in privacy!

Top Quotes

Here are some of my gf's top quotes: "The frig is so empty, it's making me nervous" "Honnnnneeeey! Cuddle me NOW!!" "Hoonneeey, toilet roll"

True Love

I've been thinking a lot about true love lately. It's a sad statistic that more and more people are getting divorces. You hear about it in the media all the time, especially with celebrity couples. It's made me wonder if true love and love and first sight actually exist in this crazy world we live in today. I know many people would argue that love at first sight doesn't exist and it's really about give and take in every relationship. I too was one of these non-believers...that is, until she walked through the door and my heart just melted. Our eyes met and it was LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT, you could even call it puppy love. She walked through that door with the cutest puppy ever!!!

It seems like women are always complaining that they have nothing to wear. My gf does this too but it's hard to take her seriously when she has more pairs of pants than I have underwear. Here's a sly photo I took of a pile of her pants 2 feet high.

Spoiled

My gf is a big believer in buying name brands. She believes that you get what you pay for. While in most cases this is true I would argue that certain brands are just over priced. To prove my point I challenged my gf to a yogurt flavored soft drink taste test. She claims that she will only drink yakult brand because everything else taste like crap. Not surprisingly Yakult cost $2.99 while competing brands cost 99 cents. Results of the taste test...? Let's just say, myth busted = )